Random Ramblings

Not So Random This Time!

Posted on: May 2, 2008

I will admit it; I have been a big chicken this week.  Yep that’s right I have been afraid to write, especially here.  After my last post on Sunday, when words just came tumbling out of me like a waterfall, and they weren’t the greatest in the world I got scared.  I was afraid that I wouldn’t be able to control myself and it wouldn’t be a good thing.  It may have taken me five days but I think I have a handle on myself and my emotions, at least a better handle than I had on Sunday. 

I don’t think that has ever happened to me before!  I have always wanted to write, sometimes I couldn’t think of anything to write but the desire was always there.  This time, the desire seemed to have vanished and I was a little worried that it wouldn’t come back.  I have to say, I wasn’t in the best place in the world when I wrote that last post, but I know in my heart that I needed to write it.  I also know that I have the need to write more, but I’m just not ready to yet.  Before I write like that again I will need to do some serious preparing so that I keep control, or rather so that I HAVE control, unlike last time! 

I do not like that feeling, you know what feeling I mean.  It’s the being afraid of not only failing, but failing miserably.  That is almost what I felt after publishing that post.  This whole new world of Blogs is a little intimidating, especially when I read other posts by other bloggers.  Some of the ones I have found write really good stuff!  I get so jealous when I read their posts and when I see how many comments they have on them.  I want that, I just don’t know how to get it.  This does not mean that I am giving up at all.  I plan on plugging away and putting new posts out as often as I can and learning as much as I can about the whole blog world.  I just need to focus a little more on it than maybe I have been.  I promise to keep at it, as long as my fingers hold out!! 

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7 Responses to "Not So Random This Time!"

I feel the same way about painting. There are days I can do no wrong. I get in the “Zone” and I paint something fantastic. Then other times, I totally screw up and waste another sheet of watercolor paper.

Even after 20 years of painting, there are I get into slumps and I screw up many times in a row. Then I feel that I’ve forgotten how to paint, and I worry that I’ll never be able to duplicate my past successes. I’m almost afraid to pick up a brush.

My advice, if you ever feel this way, is to just DO IT. Pick up the brush or the pen, and put something down on paper. Just DO IT.

And sooner than later, you’ll find your ‘zone’ again and it will all come back. It always does.

If it’s not a masterpiece, who cares? Nobody has to see it, if you don’t want them to.

(You don’t wanna know how many ‘reject’ paintings I keep hidden in a box) 🙂

Here’s a little trick I learned from a book called ‘Finding Your Voice’.

Always assume your reader is someone EXACTLY like you. Same likes, dislikes, opinions. Exposed to the same world everyday etc.

The fear will go away. You will rediscover writing and the joy of writing.

Works for me. 🙂

Friar & Vimoh,

Thank you for your words of encouragement! What you said makes a lot of sense and I don’t plan on stopping writing! I may have just needed a little electronic kick in the pants!!

Thanks & I hope to see you here again!!

Friar and Vimoh have some good observations.

You’re right, writing is completely scary, and sometimes we just don’t want to do it. We wonder if we are good enough. And it never gets easier, unfortunately.

This is what I have noticed: the bloggers who get a lot of comments have been blogging for awhile and they have been visting a lot of sites and commenting. And they do this over and over again. It’s hard work, but it’s part of the community of blogging.

Everyone has to start somewhere. I admire your courage in expressing what is frightening and true. Your efforts are real and authentic. Just keep at it.

Ellen,

Thank you for admiring my courage, I hadn’t realized that’s what I had until you pointed it out. I don’t always admit when i am afraid of things and it usually proves to be a better idea when I do!

Hope to see you around here again!

Ellen’s right. You work at it and it builds slowly.

When I started my Blog in March, I got MAYBE 10 views a day…(half of them probably from Mom). I was lucky to see 1 comment every few weeks.

Now I’m up to 50-70 views a day and I have regular visitors, and I’ve started a network of blog friends.

It keeps growing by the week, I have no idea when it’s going to level off.

Keep at it! You’ll do alright!

Friar,

I’m hoping it picks up and that I can keep writing things people want to read!!

Thanks for visiting!

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